At some point while I was playing or preparing to play Monday Night Football, the news broke about the Ferguson Decision. After trying to figure out how I felt, I decided to write it down. Here are my thoughts:
I'M ANGRY because the stories of injustice that have been passed down for generations seem to be continuing before our very eyes.
I'M FRUSTRATED, because pop culture, music and movies glorify these types of police citizen altercations and promote an invincible attitude that continues to get young men killed in real life, away from safety movie sets and music studios.
I'M FEARFUL because in the back of my mind I know that although I'm a law abiding citizen I could still be looked upon as a "threat" to those who don't know me. So I will continue to have to go the extra mile to earn the benefit of the doubt.
I'M EMBARRASSED because the looting, violent protests, and law breaking only confirm, and in the minds of many, validate, the stereotypes and thus the inferior treatment.
I'M SAD, because another young life was lost from his family, the racial divide has widened, a community is in shambles, accusations, insensitivity hurt and hatred are boiling over, and we may never know the truth about what happened that day.
I'M SYMPATHETIC, because I wasn't there so I don't know exactly what happened. Maybe Darren Wilson acted within his rights and duty as an officer of the law and killed Michael Brown in self defense like any of us would in the circumstance. Now he has to fear the backlash against himself and his loved ones when he was only doing his job. What a horrible thing to endure. OR maybe he provoked Michael and ignited the series of events that led to him eventually murdering the young man to prove a point.
I'M OFFENDED, because of the insulting comments I've seen that are not only insensitive but dismissive to the painful experiences of others.
I'M CONFUSED, because I don't know why it's so hard to obey a policeman. You will not win!!! And I don't know why some policeman abuse their power. Power is a responsibility, not a weapon to brandish and lord over the populace.
I'M INTROSPECTIVE, because sometimes I want to take "our" side without looking at the facts in situations like these. Sometimes I feel like it's us against them. Sometimes I'm just as prejudiced as people I point fingers at. And that's not right. How can I look at white skin and make assumptions but not want assumptions made about me? That's not right.
I'M HOPELESS, because I've lived long enough to expect things like this to continue to happen. I'm not surprised and at some point my little children are going to inherit the weight of being a minority and all that it entails.
I'M HOPEFUL, because I know that while we still have race issues in America, we enjoy a much different normal than those of our parents and grandparents. I see it in my personal relationships with teammates, friends and mentors. And it's a beautiful thing.
I'M ENCOURAGED, because ultimately the problem is not a SKIN problem, it is a SIN problem. SIN is the reason we rebel against authority. SIN is the reason we abuse our authority. SIN is the reason we are racist, prejudiced and lie to cover for our own. SIN is the reason we riot, loot and burn.
BUT I'M ENCOURAGED because God has provided a solution for sin through the his son Jesus and with it, a transformed heart and mind. One that's capable of looking past the outward and seeing what's truly important in every human being. The cure for the Michael Brown, Trayvon Martin, Tamir Rice and Eric Garner tragedies is not education or exposure. It's the Gospel. So, finally, I'M ENCOURAGED because the Gospel gives mankind hope.
I enjoyed reading this, but my most favorite comment of his is that he is encouraged because he sees this issue as not being about skin, but sin. However, I think he could have worded a few other things differently to keep his point whole and not contradictory. He says that there is "attitude that continues to get young men killed," but I don't think it's fair to say "gets" them killed-- It is a plethora of the person's actions, the actions of those surrounding the entire situation, the atmosphere, the timing-- so many different things that pull into it. But, I am happy that he truly looks at this as a situation not solely about race but at the injustices in our society with the low and power structures that do in turn lead to racially charged situations.
ReplyDeleteWhat I find most interesting in this account is the juxtaposition of feeling "hopeless" and feeling "hopeful." On one hand, he has somehow resigned himself to the fact that this state of oppression and racism will continue. His children will one day feel this sadness and hopelessness as well. And this is sad. But on the other hand, he feels hopeful because he recognizes that the world has come so far from what it was in previous generations. I feel the same way about many issues in the world as well as this one. There is a certain point where you look at the activism you're doing and you say, "this issue is never going to get solved," or "it's never going to get better." Then you realize that the life we live today has actually improved immensely from compared to the past. Our children may not see a better world, but their children might. And isn't that reason enough to continue to strive for improvement?
ReplyDeleteYes, Virginia I agree. I think he means the actions that stem from the attitude that gets men killed – but you are absolutely right. And that does not mean that they deserve to die because of that.
ReplyDeleteOzakh – You are so right. It’s always worth it in the end. Thanks for sharing!
Another thing that stood out to me was embedded in this quote:
“I'M FEARFUL because in the back of my mind I know that although I'm a law abiding citizen I could still be looked upon as a "threat" to those who don't know me. So I will continue to have to go the extra mile to earn the benefit of the doubt.”
One thing that struck me about this quote was the last sentence. Well every part bothers me- none of this is fair. But he says he will “continue to go the extra mile to earn the benefit of the doubt.” I have heard many people say this when asked about Rhodes. Some people say that they have to try harder to prove others wrong, or even just to fit in and feel like a part of the community. This is another injustice. Blacks should not have to “go the extra mile.” That is unfair.
I've seen this shared pretty frequently lately by some of my friends on Facebook. I find it interesting that some (but not all) of these same friends have also posted some extremely racist things.
ReplyDeleteIt's interesting to me that Benjamin Watson's comments are given more credibility because they come from the perspective of an African-American man. Should we listen to these comments more because of this? In my opinion, yes. We should certainly listen closely to the voices of those who are oppressed, and who have lived through racial oppression for their entire lives.
However, it seems that Watson's comments have become popular because they confirm the beliefs of many whites. Especially when he says, "I'M EMBARRASSED because the looting, violent protests, and law breaking only confirm, and in the minds of many, validate, the stereotypes and thus the inferior treatment." Because a black man has condemned these things, it's okay for white people to as well.
But if we're taking the view that we should listen to black voices more, than why are we only listening actively to those that agree with and confirm our own beliefs?
Certainly not everyone who shared this post feels this way, but I believe it's unfortunately the reality for many.